A Normal Morning
September 7, 2021, is a day I can never forget. It’s been over a year now, but it feels like it just happened. I also feel like it happened ages ago and was all a horrible nightmare. The day before, I spent a few hours with Pastor. His wife had passed away two weeks ago. I cooked quesadillas using the brisket I had smoked on Saturday. He was grieving, and despite several attempts to encourage him to eat, he didn’t the whole time I was there. It also meant I didn’t eat. I was hungry when I got home and had a late lunch. I had been given a diabetes diagnosis a week before and understood why I struggled so much.
Regardless, the rest of the day went pretty well. My parents were supposed to return to town to exchange supplies before setting off on a cross-country RV trip. They had spent the last month at an RV park with the new to them RV just a couple of hours away. I saved them some ribs and brisket and looked forward to seeing them.
I woke up that morning an hour before the alarm. I’ve reached an age where I can’t sleep in and often wake up before the alarm. I got ready and sat down to do some work. I work remotely, so my habit was to get some work done, plan my day, and maybe even write some code until it was time to take Megan to school. The school was about 20 minutes away, but we left early enough that she was usually 20 minutes early for school. It meant we weren’t rushed.
Megan hates being rushed, especially in the morning.
This morning, she had heated a breakfast croissant and filled her water bottle. The morning was kind of amazing. Not cold, just cool enough to be comfortable. Clear skies. I remember watching the sunrise from my office window while getting some work done and waiting for Megan. I was in the middle of some code when it was time to leave, so I saved my progress, paused the timer, and headed downstairs.
On the way to school, I chatted with Megan. I asked how she was doing, and she said, “Tired.”
That was the deal every morning. She is a night owl.
Given the choice, she would stay up past midnight and sleep past noon. But she had no choice, so she went to bed at nine and woke up before six to get ready at her slow and steady pace. It didn’t take her that long to get ready. As a teen, I would set my alarm as late as possible. I rushed through my morning routine and sometimes heard the bus coming before I was fully ready.
Megan likes to take her time in the morning. She sets multiple alarms and tries to wake up early enough to move at the speed of Megan but still get out on time. This morning was no different. She was ready to leave, not a moment too soon, but in a good mood because she wasn’t rushed.
I joked with her that it was still “early morning.”
Earlier that year, we talked about “early morning.” To her, any time before 10 a.m. was early morning. Then 10-11 was mid-morning, and 11-11:59 was late morning. Granted, she is driven and motivated. She woke up with the alarm that she set. I didn’t have to drag her out of bed. She didn’t like waking up but did what she needed to do without being forced.
That’s who she is.
So she was tired, but as far as I could tell, perfectly healthy.
Two weeks previous, she had seen a doctor at the family practice we use. They did an annual wellness check and physical on her for band. Megan had told the doctor about the pain she had been having in her chest. When the doctor listened, everything sounded normal, so she suggested Megan might be suffering from anxiety due to all of the things she was doing and the high achieving level she did it at. She also mentioned the possibility of needing some antacids and potential diet changes if it was heartburn. Otherwise, she passed with flying colors, and the doctor said she was in perfect health.
Looking back, those mornings were some of the best. With four kids, it can be tough finding alone time with them. When her older sister was in band, I took her to band camp, and her mom went with her to competitions. When Megan had graduated from middle school, leaving her younger brother as the only one of our kids in elementary, we took him to breakfast or on walks every day after dropping his siblings off at middle and high school. Megan’s older brother has been challenging to get alone for things. We are still trying to find our special time, but this was prime daddy-daughter time with Megan.
Despite everything else that happened that day, I am grateful for this morning’s routine: no fights, no angst, just happy daddy-daughter time.